Poopy Day

So poo-poo on this day.

So I think we all know by now I suck at taking my medicine every day.  In fact, with this heading where it’s going to I will even tell you now…I haven’t even taken my medicine yet for today.  That should tell you how stellar I am.  And it’s not like my pills were all the way at my house while I was at work.  (In the past I have been keeping them at my desk at work.)  No, I decided to start keeping them in my computer bag because that way I can remember to take them.

Actually, a friend of mine with whom I was talking about my shitty moods and not taking my pills like I should suggested I start keeping them in my bag.  I took her up on the suggestion.  And today, while I was at work and knew I was in a foul mood, my bag sat next to my desk.  All day.  With the pills inside.  Waiting for me to take them.  I didn’t.  I still haven’t.  Even after sitting at the coffee shop and talking to her about it.

I think I pissed her off today, actually, but I can’t say I give a fuck.  I mean I did tell her this was one of those days where I have no fucks left to give.  Someone at work today asked me what was wrong.  She said I didn’t seem this way when I first came in.

The thing is, most of the time I don’t feel like I’m in a bad mood or like this is going to be a bad day when I first get up.  It’s usually at work that I get pissed off.  Like, as soon as I fucking walk in the god damn door I get pissed!  Something about being at work sends me over the edge.  They don’t have to do anything.  Nobody has to piss me off when I get there.  All they have to do is say “hi” and I’ll get pissed.

But I wasn’t in a rageful mood, I just didn’t feel like doing anything and didn’t feel like being bothered.  Today was one of those days when I just wanted to be left alone.

I’m going to get up and take my pills now.  Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

And maybe my missing 1 day – or maybe 2 – of pills has nothing to do with my mood, I don’t know.  It wasn’t a “bad” day but it wasn’t a “good” day, either.  It was one of those days that when I was coming home I was thinking I would like to go somewhere alone this weekend and just get away.

I should look for some gay cabins or gay campgrounds with cabins.  I need a little bit of “home comforts.”  Like running fucking water, an air conditioner, and a nice CLEAN toilet!  But that would be fun.

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