My Life is a Hot Mess – Driver’s License – Part 3

Old English Birth Certificate reverse

Old English Birth Certificate reverse (Photo credit: crabchick)

So after being on hold with my states DMV “Contact Center” for about 30 minutes, I finally got into information I needed.

I thought this was going to be much easier than it really is.  I thought I could just go down to the courthouse and pay the fine, but I can’t.  This six month old ticket has been sent to collections.  I called them and paid the ticket.  Now it is going to take 72 hours to get the clearance letter I need.

Once I get that letter – and I hope like fuck I’m not pulled over between now and then…or when I go get the fucking letter – I will then have to go get a copy of my birth certificate.

Thank god my dad is still alive and I can use him as proof, I guess, that I’m his and he can get my birth certificate.  We will have to drive to the city in which I was born and get the certificate.  Then I will have to go, with him, to the DMV for him to act as my proof of residence and get my license.

And how much is all of this going to cost?  When it is said and done, not including the cost of the gas for the trip, I will pay $451.03.  All for a ticket that originally only cost 200-fucking-dollars!

I am such a goddamn loser until it’s not even funny!

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