Don’t read this if you don’t like “poop talk!”
Tonight slash in the morning will be day number seven of a fucked up stomach! This is seriously fucked up and I don’t know what’s going on. I have been sick for almost 7 days now and this is driving me fucking crazy. I don’t feel good. I don’t feel “horrible,” but I also certainly don’t feel good.
I just ate some chicken soup and soda crackers, mostly just crackers and the broth, and I’m not sure what’s going on in my stomach. It kind of feels like I need to go to the bathroom, but I’m not quite sure yet. When I need to pee, sometimes I feel like I need to go number 2, instead.
Okay, it’s been an hour or two since I ate and I didn’t have to go to the bathroom yet, but my stomach is still rumbly.
This morning I had diarrhea but yesterday I only went once, I think, and it was kind of solid. It actually was solid but it was just a small bit and not the right consistency.
Do you really know how bad it is when you “feel bad?” It just completely destroys your life!
How the fuck am I going to work with this going on? It’s very fucking difficult! And I have been absolutely unproductive all fucking week this week! I don’t want to go through this another fucking week! I guess I’m going to need to work while I can and hope that will make up for the times when I don’t feel good. At least with my job right now, most of the time, I do have a bathroom available when I need it.
And I do have to say, Monday was absolute hell! Tuesday, on the other hand, was much better. I felt almost normal. On Monday, starting probably around midnight, it was absolute hell because I pooped so much until I think it was just acid coming out because my butt hurt like holy hell! I even saw some blood. By Tuesday, I believe, all that was better. I don’t remember if I had to go to the bathroom that morning, but I did Wednesday. Starting Monday it has pretty much been good day, bad day, good day, bad day.
At first I was thinking it was just something like a stomach virus because Monday night I did have chills and a headache but the headache was after taking a nap and I don’t know if that was just because of how I slept because that does sometimes happen to me. But for the rest of the time I have had no other symptoms other than fucking diarrhea! I’ve been taking Imodium A-D which has helped. I’ve needed something that would help just to give my fucking anus time to HEAL! With the acid it has hurt like fucking hell and I think that’s where the blood came from. It was bright red which, from what I have read online, is a sign of lower intestinal issues which they say can come from all the diarrhea. I hope it’s not a hemorrhoids issue.
Tonight I’m going to eat mashed potatos and a plain hamburger, cooked well, with provolone cheese. We’ll see how that works out.
And throughout all of this, I have still been horny and have masturbated. Although, during this, especially while my anus hurt (but never to the point it hurt to sit down, thank god), my balls have been a little achie. And I haven’t been urinating very forcefully. That scares me because of a prostate issue and all the reading I’ve done online. That’s never a good thing to do.
This has also brought up some other issues I would like to write about. Maybe later. I’ve been working on them but just haven’t posted them – or finished them – yet.
Oh, and one more thing I forgot to mention about when I feel bad. When I feel bad and sick, and scared about what might be wrong, I feel really, really guilt about all the money I have spent on things I don’t really need!